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iMPACT! - March 9th 2009

- Impact is a weekly taped show, that takes place on Monday Night. Wrestlers have 1 week to complete their match.
- The matches need to be started, and observed by the owner, a creative team member, or a match official, for the match to count towards the card's result. All of these people are listed on the staff page.
- If you are unable to participate in a show where you are booked, let one of those people know as soon as possible so we can rework the card.

Netto Cash defeated Jericho
(Regular Match)
Netto Cash came out to rap music and loud cheers, wearing his signature torn blue jeans with a noticeable bulge in his right pocket. Netto smiled to the crowd as he waited for Jericho. The lights went out and Y2J's music played and fans pelted him with soda cans. Jericho shook it off and slid into the ring where he quickly took control of the match with his superior wrestling abilities. Unfortunately for Jericho, wrestling abilities would not matter in this bout. Jericho went for the lionsault which Netto countered with a knee to the groin area. Jericho was hurt and Netto "accidently" whipped Jericho into the referee, knocking both men out. This is when Netto went for his glock in his right pocket. He prepared the shot as the crowd was cheering only for compro to run in and knock the glock out of Netto's hand to the ground. Netto was able to packet drop compro on top of Jericho and pin both men to a long three count before picking up his glock and shooting it into the air for the crowds approval. He then grabbed a microphone.

Netto Cash: Compro you dumb nigga. You try to sneak up on Netto Cash? These pregnant doges have been sayin for months that Netto Cash was washed up, a has been. But in a matter of seven days (he fires seven bullets) Netto will be the Patriot Champion. Compro I hope you got a good connection bro cuz Netto is gonna drop it quicker than Ice sucks a thingy. I was always the man carryin our tag team when we ruled the tag-titles. And at WrestleMania, Netto Cash has one bullet left. That bullets for you compro. It's time for me to put yo old dog ass out of misery pregnant dog. VIRUS f**kING DETECTED. Prepare for defragmentation.

Shaun Swagger defeated Daniel MI
(Regular Match)
Shaun Swagger made his way out the ring to Rage Against the Machine, Down on Your Knees, as the crowd booed him loudly. Swagger simply smiled as he always does and ignored the negative chorus that surrounded him. He calmly entered the ring unphased by his welcoming and awaited his opponent.

Daniel MI was next to enter to generic jobber music and the sound of crickets. In the back of the arena a piece of popcorn falling from a stimulus check receiving bus driver was heard. As Daniel MI was entering the ring Shaun Swagger immediately gave him an exceptionally stiff clothesline to the throat that sent Daniel to the floor with a huge thud. Swagger began cursing as he stomped the chest of Daniel MI repeatedly again and again until blood slowly oozed from the mouth of Daniel. Swagger lifted up Daniel for his finishing maneuver and downed him as he slapped Daniel left to right several times before pinning him. He then grabbed a microphone.

Shaun Swagger: I hope you all know who I am now. I have been mishandled since I first arrived in the IWWF but that will not be the case any longer. I will no longer rely upon the upper incompetent management in the IWWF to take care of me, I will take charge. That's why I'm looking for any IWWF Veteran who's looking for an early social security check. Come face Shaun Swagger. Hello? Anyone there? No IWWF Geezer's in the back who've been able to keep their position this long only because of...

Suddenly dark smoke fills the arena and a cold chill begins to raise the hairs on the necks of everyone in attendance. An evil omniscient voice is heard.

Daemon X: Shaun Swagger. You're request has been granted. Wrestle Mania Five. You WILL face the herald of destruction himself. When the dark force has penetrated your human veins sufficiently, you will cease to breathe and at that moment, you will proclaim Daemon X as your lord and master. May heaven have mercy on your soul.

Charlton J defeated Sarah NG
(Regular Match)
Charlton J had called out Sarah Ng the week before to prove that it was he who more deserving of a spot in the MITB match at WrestleMania. Unfortunately for Charlton J he would be unable to convince the upper management at IWWF that this was the case. Sarah was able to continue her winning streak and easily dispose of Charlton J. After the match Charlton grabbed a mic.

Charlton J: I'm washed up. I'm done. I'm a piece of garbage. That's what I am. Garbage. Trash. I'm through. Mr. Kronick, accept my resignation from the IWWF, I don't have what it takes to be here anymore.

Charlton J walked out through the crowd shoving fans down on his way out of the arena.

Contract signing for Wrestlemania V's match event between 2009 Royal Rumble Winner Jason Voorhees and IWWF Champion Marley G
Marley G came out wearing the U.K. flag as his ring attire and the IWWF Championship polished around his waist. He was greeted to the loudest cheers of the night as he removed the belt and held it up on top of the ring posts to a collage of flashes from cameras.

Marley G: Well hey now there mates. Marley G here IWWF Champ! They always be sayin that Marley G is done or Marley G ain't nottin but I think we all showed them once again that Marley G is the biggest champ the IWWF has ever seen! This WM will be just another PPV with Marley G at the top of it. I don't care if I'm facin king kong in the ring, if you're fightin Marley G you're gonna get an ass whoopin.

The lights dim and blue and black lasers illuminate the entrance way as Jason Voorhees makes his way slowly and methodically to the ring to boos. His signature hockey mask is secured around his face as he enters the ring and towers over Marley G.

Marley G: What the f**k are you even supposed to be, mate? (Marley shoves Jason) Say somethin ya smelly piece of nuts! (Shoves him again) d**n it mate what the f**k is your problem? This is supposed to be my opponent? Some mute-deaf mother f**ker? Hahahah!!! (Marley G goes to shove Jason again but this time Jason grabs the arm of Marley G and twists it behind Marley's head before leveling him completely through the ring. Dust rises up from the debris as Jason's mother is seen on the KronickTron)

Jason's Mom: Marley G. Nothing will stand in the way of my dear boy Jason from capturing the biggest title in this industry today for the first time. I suggest you show up sober to WrestleMania if you hope on keeping your neck attached to your body.

Frosty defeated pixelmixer
(Regular Match)
In another match that would see MITB opponents for WM go head to head, Pixelmixer chose to make a statement in his IWWF return match rather than get the win. It was clear that Frosty was in better ring shape than Pixelmixer but that would not deter Pixelmixer to resorting to his usual dastardly tricks. Pixelmixer made the New Generation symbol with his arms which prompted a fan in the front row to rip off his attire revealing himself to be none other than Shen Du HBK. Pixelmixer shouted out "hi2shen" and Shen sweet chined music Frosty between the eyes as the ref immediately called for the bell.

Pixelmixer: I know what you're all wondering. (Cheers) Is New Gen back? The better question is, did New Gen ever break up!? New Gen is more than just a stable. It's a doctrine, a way of life.

Shen Du HBK: Ya. I second everything pix is saying.

Pixelmixer: (kicks frosty out of the ring) Shen has been making millions in his profession as a soccer player and I have finally returned from my mission to eradicate black persons. Unfortunately I was not too successful as I see many black persons runnin around the IWWF these days. Not for long. MITB is almost here and pixelmixer will get the shot he deserves at wearin the gold. HI 2 SHEN!

The Rock defeated H0LLYWOOD
(Regular Match)
Two more MITB participants squared off in what was one of the few clean finishes of the night. The Rock had been shaky lately but he was able to finally get the upper hand in a match when he dodged the Hollywood Leg Drop and rock bottomed Hollywood for the 1-2-3.

Josh Heartbrand defeated Sith
(Regular Match)
It was supposed to be the grand return of Sith to the ring. JHB made sure that it would not be the momentous occasion everyone had anticipated. JHB entered to The Final Countdown wearing black sweatpants with the letters J H B in silver engraved on the sides. The fans booed him loudly but JHB as always just smiled and even torn a few posters up as he approached the ring. Sith came out next to the Imperial March and loud cheers as he made his return.

JHB and Sith immediately began to grapple with each other for control with Heartbrand coming up on top. He performed a beautiful neck breaker and went for a quick two count. JHB continued to demonstrate why he is one of the best technical wrestlers in the IWWF today when Sith finally was able to fight back and use his brute strength to his advantage over JHB with several punishing body slams and suplexes. This is when things would get dirty. The Rock made his way out to the ring and challenge Sith to a war of words. JHB took advantage of the situation and low blowed sith before delivering The Return To Hartford covering him for the three count.

JHB: There's only one thing that pisses me off more than these so-called legends. Washed up legends. Sith do yourself a favor and get out of JHB's ring. There's bigger things to discuss. Wrestle Mania. The Tag-Titles will finally be awarded once again. If Jericho's performance tonight is any predictor than you may as well place our names on the belts already. JHB does one thing, and one thing only at PPV's. Win. Enjoy your two and a half minutes of fame at Wrestle Mania and another ten on your back.

Banging defeated Jason Voorhees
(Hardcore Match)
In a WM flashback match Banging was set to face the living monster known only as Jason. We would never get to see how this match would truly turn out as Marley G showed up with a baseball bat in hand. Bandaged up and clearly in pain, Marley G swung six times to the back of Jason Voorhees finally taking Voorhees down before sliding him out of the ring. Voorhees was counted out and Banging was announced the winner as he looked confused at the going ons, shrugged, and smiled. Marley G tossed the bat down and retreated to the back.

Ice defeated Compro & Mr. Kronick
(Handicap Match)
In what was supposed to be a crowning victory for the owner of the IWWF, Ice managed to humiliate Mr. Kronick once again. After a previous pinfall which was awarded to Ice was overturned by Mr. Kronick, a participant in the match, compro finally managed to gain the upper hand over Ice. He had Ice down for the count as he went to pin him before Mr. Kronick demanded that compro tag him in so that he could have the prestige and glory of pinning Ice. Mr. Kronick strutted around the ring to loud boos as he gave a few hard kicks with his black loafers to Ice's tie-dyed face. Mr. Kronick then ripped off his leather versace belt and began to choke Ice with it. The referee threatened to disqualify Mr. Kronick who then told the ref that he would be fired if he took any action. After show boating for a long amount of time, Mr. Kronick decided it was time to finally lay on top of Ice for the win. As the ref was about to count three, Ice managed to flip Mr. Kronick over and pin him for a quick three count before compro could come to Mr. Kronick's rescue. The crowd went ballistic but the excitement was short lived as compro brought a chair into the ring and knocked Ice out. Mr. Kronick was clearly outraged as he ordered security guards with batons to come to the ring and deal with Ice. Ice was battered from head to toe before he was dragged off in a stretcher with Mr. Kronick laughing maniacally over him.

Marley G defeated Undertaker
(Main Event, Regular Match, Non-Title)
Champion vs. Champion. Old school wrestling. That was what this match was supposed to be about. It never came to fruition. About three minutes into the match Jason made an appearance. He showed no signs of weakness from the previous baseball bat attack and Marley G knew he was in deep nuts. Marley motioned for Jason to bring it as Undertaker was equally confronted by Banging, challenger to the IRC Title. Pandemonium broke out in the ring as the champions and challengers faced off against each other exchanging lefts and rights. After Marley had dealt with Undertaker and Jason had finished off Banging, the two turned around to see each other, not quite, eye to eye. Marley went for the first punch and Jason responded. The two continued to brawl before Marley dropkicked Jason over the top rope who still managed to land on both feet. The two stared at each other as the camera went black.

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